Sorry...

I'm sitting here. My soul feels black.
The music pours. I'm thinking. I'm thinking about all the people I've hurt. And about those I keep hurting. Just by not closing my mouth. About my dad, whom I hurt the most just because I did what I had to do. About my mum, who has enough problems without me telling her that she doesn't understand me or whatever. About my friends, who I left here without any shame.
I'd like to say I'm sorry. I'm sorry for all that, I'm sorry that I can't think before I say something. I'm sorry that I hurt you all. I'm sorry that I love you, 'cause that means I'm gonna say something stupid sooner or later. I'm sorry that I lie to you sometimes. There's no excuse for that. Still, I'm sorry. I think I do it 'cause I believe this is a way not to hurt you... And I'm sorry. I'm sorry I'm sometimes a bitch to all of you. I don't ask you to forgive me. But I hope...