29.11.08
22.11.08
12.11.08
Чернова
We've always feared the darkness. Oh, yes, we have. But since she was just a kid under the blanket, she knew that looking in the dark room makes the fear if not disappear, then at least diminish.
She always used this. No one else seemed to realize it. Fear exists if there is something unknown. When you know your enemies well enough, you don't fear them.
She touched her nose. She was feeling dizzy the whole day and she was dreaming of the evening which seemed so far...
She tried to concentrate. It was very important to listen in the class: otherwise it was almost impossible to learn at home. At least not without her parents help, something she didn't want to ask for.
- What is the meaning of the word communism? - The teacher asked. She sighed. History. Then she raised her hand.
The teacher looked around, awaiting the students to figure out the answer. He didn't have any chance to ask someone else, so he said:
- Yes?
She gave the answer.
-Very well - said the teacher and continued the lesson. She listened carefully despite the fact that concentration didn't come easily, it didn't come at all.
At the end of the lesson she took her stick and rushed to the door. No one came in her way. She stepped with the self confidence of someone who knew every single cm of the place and so it was.
In the passage a girl came to her and touched her shoulder.
- Hay, Anny, how's it going? - she asked, touching the girls shoulder on her turn.
- Not really good, I'm having problems with maths and besides the teacher doesn't like me. - Anny said and made a face. - How's with you, I haven't seen you for ages!
- Well... my dog wasn't ok and obviously the last months we're so close, that I felt bad myself. But it's ok now.
- Nice - Anny said.
They walked some time in silence.
- Are you really going to do this? - Anny finally said.
- To do what?
- Go to school like the others. This is your chance not to! You don't have to! You can do whatever you want and no one will tell you anything!
- You don't understand. I can't do anything I want. I can't do anything at all. I'm blind, Anny. I can do whatever I want but not the only thing I really want, ok? And I'm not going to sit and wait silently to die. Not me. My life might be different from the life of the others but it's not going to be less worthy. I swear.
Anny looked at her very closely. She didn't say anything. Suddenly she was afraid.
They stood like that for a while, then the bell rang and they rushed to their rooms, she with her stick, making her way like a ship through the water.
The next class was Biology and they had to make a test. When she came in, the teacher said to her:
- I will give the others the test and John will stay with them as long as we're busy, ok? - his voice was comforting. She liked him.
- Yes, thanks.
After he had given the other students the test they went to a small classroom next door.
- So. - he said quietly. There was nothing in the intonation to suggest a question.
- Yes - still, she answered. She knew he needed the answer.
- You know, I've never had a student like you.
- Surely not. Every other who got blind went to a school for blind children, didn't they?
- No. I've never had a student who could remember every single word I say and understand it, feel it and finally replace it by one's own words - said the teacher.
- Thank you, sir - she could only say.
- Thank you, too, for giving me so much to teach my students.
She blushed.
- Now - he said. - I heard, that you could type?
- Yes, I can.
- Well, let me see - he said and smiled. She knew he smiled and she was thankful. He was the only one who didn't think it was stupid to smile to a blind person.
She always used this. No one else seemed to realize it. Fear exists if there is something unknown. When you know your enemies well enough, you don't fear them.
She touched her nose. She was feeling dizzy the whole day and she was dreaming of the evening which seemed so far...
She tried to concentrate. It was very important to listen in the class: otherwise it was almost impossible to learn at home. At least not without her parents help, something she didn't want to ask for.
- What is the meaning of the word communism? - The teacher asked. She sighed. History. Then she raised her hand.
The teacher looked around, awaiting the students to figure out the answer. He didn't have any chance to ask someone else, so he said:
- Yes?
She gave the answer.
-Very well - said the teacher and continued the lesson. She listened carefully despite the fact that concentration didn't come easily, it didn't come at all.
At the end of the lesson she took her stick and rushed to the door. No one came in her way. She stepped with the self confidence of someone who knew every single cm of the place and so it was.
In the passage a girl came to her and touched her shoulder.
- Hay, Anny, how's it going? - she asked, touching the girls shoulder on her turn.
- Not really good, I'm having problems with maths and besides the teacher doesn't like me. - Anny said and made a face. - How's with you, I haven't seen you for ages!
- Well... my dog wasn't ok and obviously the last months we're so close, that I felt bad myself. But it's ok now.
- Nice - Anny said.
They walked some time in silence.
- Are you really going to do this? - Anny finally said.
- To do what?
- Go to school like the others. This is your chance not to! You don't have to! You can do whatever you want and no one will tell you anything!
- You don't understand. I can't do anything I want. I can't do anything at all. I'm blind, Anny. I can do whatever I want but not the only thing I really want, ok? And I'm not going to sit and wait silently to die. Not me. My life might be different from the life of the others but it's not going to be less worthy. I swear.
Anny looked at her very closely. She didn't say anything. Suddenly she was afraid.
They stood like that for a while, then the bell rang and they rushed to their rooms, she with her stick, making her way like a ship through the water.
The next class was Biology and they had to make a test. When she came in, the teacher said to her:
- I will give the others the test and John will stay with them as long as we're busy, ok? - his voice was comforting. She liked him.
- Yes, thanks.
After he had given the other students the test they went to a small classroom next door.
- So. - he said quietly. There was nothing in the intonation to suggest a question.
- Yes - still, she answered. She knew he needed the answer.
- You know, I've never had a student like you.
- Surely not. Every other who got blind went to a school for blind children, didn't they?
- No. I've never had a student who could remember every single word I say and understand it, feel it and finally replace it by one's own words - said the teacher.
- Thank you, sir - she could only say.
- Thank you, too, for giving me so much to teach my students.
She blushed.
- Now - he said. - I heard, that you could type?
- Yes, I can.
- Well, let me see - he said and smiled. She knew he smiled and she was thankful. He was the only one who didn't think it was stupid to smile to a blind person.
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